Let Pain Bring Beauty.

Pain isn't fun, but it doesn't mean you have to suffer...

Think about the worse day of your life.

What you were doing? What did you see, feel, smell, and hear?

Now think about the best day of your life and all the senses you experienced.

In both situations, some level of pain was felt. You may feel the potency of emotions tied to the worse day of your life a bit more because of the pain associated with it.

What happened after your worse day? At some point, the pain subsided and you started to move forward. Maybe you even had one of the best days of your life shortly after.

Pain gave way for the beauty to blossom.

Let me bring you along on a situation I recently went through…

Back in March, I had the honor to attend my 2nd Plant Medicine retreat with one of my best buds, Jay Azeltine who hosts these retreats. During the week we participate in 4 ceremonies involving sacred plant medicine. Three of which involve direct ingestion or application of a physical substance to induce a spiritual experience.

The 4th ceremony doesnt involve anything but simply sitting.

This ceremony I am referencing is a Temescal or what’s commonly referred to as the Sweat Lodge. An indigenous Northern American spiritual ceremony that is supposed to represent the shedding of layers and a rebirth of the soul.

Sitting on the dirt ground inside a 3ft high bamboo structure covered in heavy blankets. In the center, a 3-foot deep hole would hold the lava rocks that we would pour water in to create the steam.

It’s dark, it’s hot, it’s uncomfortable, and can seemingly go on for what seems like forever.

A Temescal.

This would be my second time participating in the ceremony within the month. The first time was extremely challenging but I felt confident in what to expect this time around. I set some deep intentions to work through a lot of personal issues I was neglecting.

You can be in the temescal for anywhere from 2-4+ hours, there is no set time. It’s easy to break up the long duration because they’re 4 doors that each have a specific purpose. But when you’re in it, you see them as a little bit of relief from the intense steam you are in… only for it to close and become even more intense.

This ceremony was not the worse day in my life, but it is one of the hardest thing I have ever put my body through.

As the door closed and the water was poured on the lava rocks by our leader, the physical sensations of overheating were prevalent. 5 minutes in, I was in the fetal position in the mud, struggling. By the time the 2nd door closed, I was in a bad place in my mind. Having a training, nutrition, first-aid/combat lifesaver background, I knew very well I was suffering signs of heat exhaustion and creeping into heat stroke. It was hard to see, my stomach was in pain, my legs were cramping, and oddly enough I was vibrating and tingling in my limbs and head. I was getting steamrolled.

As I sat there and fought the thoughts of quitting and getting out, our leader shared some sage advice.

He stated, “In the West, we treat everything by the symptoms. What we feel and what we see. The symptoms are always treated first.”

In my head, I was doing exactly this, following the symptoms just to make sense of what was happening.

He continues, “Allow the body to experience what it is experiencing, allow it to surpass its limits. In life, Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.”

It hit me. I was CHOOSING to suffer. I was CHOOSING to listen to the rationales my mind made of what was happening to me at the moment. I didn’t have to suffer any longer. Not neglecting the pain, just neglecting the emotion of suffering.

Once we finished the ceremony, time is spent in the nearby river. For multiple purposes but the main ones being to cool down, be silent, to reflect. While in the river, as the thoughts were coming and going all of a sudden the chatter stopped. It was welcoming to be still in the mind. Through the silence, a voice came over. It was a feminine voice I never heard before. It left as quickly as it came. But the message it left me felt like it healed years of pain.

It told me simply, “You are Loved, my sweet child.”

Emotions attempted to pour from me, but nothing manifested. I was drained and had nothing to give, but I knew I needed to get it out.

One of the ways to “get it out” is to induce a purge. In ceremony settings like this, a sacred tobacco called Hape is blown into each nostril. Vomit can quickly come about. This is exactly what happened. Jay served me and I purged everything from within. Battling the intense feelings that ensued, I choose not to feel as if I was suffering and just let it be, really just let it ‘run its course’. Once these intense feelings subsided, it felt as if more layers just melted from me. And my heart and soul were overwhelmed with a sense of love and appreciation.

I believe those feelings were only felt because of the pain I had just experienced for the past 3-4 hours. Choosing to be and to sit with the pain, choosing the perspective of not suffering made room for the beautiful message to come through.

You don’t need to participate in ceremonies like this to induce these feelings and understanding.

Every day we feel pain.

The physical pain of bettering our health. The emotional pain of having to deal with a bad family situation, and the Spiritual pain of finding our way back to the oneness, God.

So next time it hurts to go to move your body, to have that hard conversation with a loved one, or to be brutally honest with the path you are on. Feel and understand the pain, but do not allow yourself to suffer.

Choosing to suffer is not serving you.

Choosing to feel the pain and keep moving forward will show you the power Pain can bring you.

PAIN IS INEVITABLE, SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL.

Be Relentless.